We have successfully grown centimeter-sized layered $R$SrNiO$_4$ single crystals under high oxygen pressures of 120 bar by the floating zone technique. This enabled us to perform neutron scattering experiments where we observe close to quarter-integer magnetic peaks below $sim$77 K that are accompanied by steep upwards dispersing spin excitations. Within the high-frequency Ni-O bond stretching phonon dispersion, a softening at the propagation vector for a checkerboard modulation can be observed. Together with our spin wave simulations these observations reveal that this Ni$^{3+}$ system exhibits charge disproportionation with charges segregating into a checkerboard pattern within a nano phase separation scenario rather than showing a Jahn-Teller effect.