Non-Fermi liquids in $d=2$ spatial dimensions can arise from coupling a Fermi surface to a gapless boson. At finite temperature, however, the perturbative quantum field theory description breaks down due to infrared divergences. These are caused by virtual static bosonic modes, and afflict both fermionic and bosonic correlators. We show how these divergences are resolved by self-consistent boson and fermion self-energies that resum an infinite class of diagrams and correct the standard Eliashberg equations. Extending a previous approach in $d=3-epsilon$ dimensions, we find a new thermal non-Fermi liquid regime that violates the scaling laws of the zero temperature fixed point and dominates over a wide range of scales. We conclude that basic properties of quantum phase transitions and quantum-classical crossovers at finite temperature are modified in crucial ways in systems with soft bosonic fluctuations, and we begin a study of some of the phenomenological consequences.