In order to single out dominant phenomena that account for carrier-controlled magnetism in p-(Cd,Mn)Te quantum wells we have carried out magneto-optical measurements and Monte Carlo simulations of time dependent magnetization. The experimental results show that magnetization relaxation is faster than 20 ns in the paramagnetic state. Decreasing temperature below the Curie temperature Tc results in an increase of the relaxation time but to less than 10 micro seconds. This fast relaxation may explain why the spontaneous spin splitting of electronic states is not accompanied by the presence of non-zero macroscopic magnetization below Tc. Our Monte Carlo results reproduce the relative change of the relaxation time on decreasing temperature. At the same time, the numerical calculations demonstrate that antiferromagnetic spin-spin interactions, which compete with the hole-mediated long-range ferromagnetic coupling, play an important role in magnetization relaxation of the system. We find, in particular, that magnetization dynamics is largely accelerated by the presence of antiferromagnetic couplings to the Mn spins located outside the region, where the holes reside. This suggests that macroscopic spontaneous magnetization should be observable if the thickness of the layer containing localized spins will be smaller than the extension of the hole wave function. Furthermore, we study how a spin-independent part of the Mn potential affects Tc. Our findings show that the alloy disorder potential tends to reduce Tc, the effect being particularly strong for the attractive potential that leads to hole localization.