In this paper we describe a novel, model-independent technique of rectangular aggregations for mining the LHC data for hints of new physics. A typical (CMS) search now has hundreds of signal regions, which can obscure potentially interesting anomalies. Applying our technique to the two CMS jets+MET SUSY searches, we identify a set of previously overlooked $sim 3sigma$ excesses. Among these, four excesses survive tests of inter- and intra-search compatibility, and two are especially interesting: they are largely overlapping between the jets+MET searches and are characterized by low jet multiplicity, zero $b$-jets, and low MET and $H_T$. We find that resonant color-triplet production decaying to a quark plus an invisible particle provides an excellent fit to these two excesses and all other data -- including the ATLAS jets+MET search, which actually sees a correlated excess. We discuss the additional constraints coming from dijet resonance searches, monojet searches and pair production. Based on these results, we believe the wide-spread view that the LHC data contains no interesting excesses is greatly exaggerated.
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