The theory of phase control of coherence, entanglement and quantum steering is developed for an optomechanical system composed of a single mode cavity containing a partially transmitting dielectric membrane and driven by short laser pulses. The closed loop in the coupling creates interfering channels which depend on the relative phase of the coupling strengths of the field modes to the mechanical mode. We show several interesting phase dependent effects such as reversible population transfer from one field mode to the other, creation of collective modes, and induced coherence without induced emission. These effects result from perfect mutual coherence between the field modes which is preserved even if one of the modes is not populated. Depending on the phase, the field modes can act on the mechanical mode collectively or individually resulting, respectively, in tripartite or bipartite entanglement. In addition, we examine the phase sensitivity of quantum steering of the mechanical mode by the field modes is investigated. Deterministic phase transfer of the steering from bipartite to collective is predicted and optimum steering corresponding to perfect EPR state can be achieved. These different types of quantum steering can be distinguished experimentally by measuring the coincidence rate between two detectors adjusted to collect photons of the output cavity modes. In particular, we find that the minima of the interference pattern of the coincidence rate signal the bipartite steering, while the maxima signal the collective steering.